THE RUNNING MAN

I’m positive that the “running man” has been out of style for at least 15 years in America. If you don’t know what the “running man” dance move is then you are so out of it, either that or you just were not a ‘hip’ during the time when it was ‘hip.’ (Just google it) Anyhow, I am also positive that the ‘running man’ never ever made it over the Atlantic to the part of the world where I am dwelling (I just thought of one thousand cheesy jokes I could make about the running man right here but I refrained so you would keep reading). This is where my story begins.

As you know I have a friend here whose house and family I like to visit. My friend has a name and that is Elnur. He also has a last name but I don’t know it and if I did there would be now way that I would have the correct characters to spell it and you wouldn’t be able to say it anyways. Tonight I visited his family, and like always, we ate a ton of food. God either gave these people larger stomachs or faster metabolisms because I am always amazed at how they can out eat me without even trying. We did that for a good hour and a half and then the real fun began. You see last time I was there they began teaching me how to dance their traditional dance. I’m a novelty! They love watching me and I love pleasing them. Okay, so I’m not really a pet, I do enjoy learning this type of dance. The first wedding that I go to here I’m gonna break out the moves and everyone will be so astonished that this ‘American’ can dance. That is when it happened. They looked at me and said, “Teach us your dance.” I tried to tell them that we don’t really have ‘a dance.’ But music and dance is such a part of their culture that they didn’t understand and kept asking me to show them something. That’s when I pulled it out, The Running Man, and that was just the beginning of my bag of ‘outdated and uncool dance moves in America yet new and really technically amazing here’ tricks. I did the Running Man in a small house outside the city that I’m pretty sure never had the running man performed in before. I was so on, every beat, I felt it, coursing through my blood, the rhythm, the motion. That must have been what the inventor of the running man felt. The best part came next. They tried the Running Man. I wish you could have seen it. They loved it!! Then they put on some techno and asked me to show them some more, so I followed with “The Worm”, “The Robot”, “The Sprinkler”, and everyone’s favorite “The M.C. Hammer, Can’t Touch this dance”. I was hesitant at first because of my own culture, but then I realized “they’ve never seen these before.” And suddenly I became a dancer. Everyone reading this right now would have laughed at me, but they were trying them and loving them. After a half and hour of that, we put away our dancing shoes and called it a night. I will look forward to the next meeting where I’m thinking about maybe introducing the “Mashed Potato”, “The Matt Deprez”, and “The Monster Mash.”

Moral of the story: Nothing ever loses its coolness…nothing.